The Atheist

So right off the bat, I'll tell you this isn't a post about religion, or lack of religion. It's about inadvertently taking what you hate the most in others' behavior and doing the same thing to counteract it.

Sometimes people get pretty offended about pushy religious fanatics who preach of fire and brimstone to those who do not share the same beliefs. It's easy to see why. Many of those people ignore the cardinal rule in almost every religion--do not judge. This hypocrisy can build up to shape some pretty angry reactions.

Someone I know as a lose acquaintance through mutual environmental interests is an atheist. He's a smart guy, and in person, he's very likable. But each day on Facebook, and multiple times each day, he shares post after post intimating how stupid people are to believe there is anything beyond the physical world of science we can see and touch and measure. His belief is just that, his. 

It's up to each one of us to decide not to judge others for what they believe, but it's quite interesting to see him proselytizing about atheism in the same way he must hate religious fanatics proselytizing about the right way to live.

I've see the same situation play out with some feminists who hate the strong, overbearing and domineering attitude of some men, yet use the same tactics to get their points across in the world. It's amusing. But people start to turn them off the same way...and there's a reason for it.

10 Things That Make Me Want to Crawl in a Hole

No, no of course I'm not complaining. I'm getting it out, trying to make myself laugh, failing at convincing myself it's really just funny and not something to get all tight about.

But what the hell? Here are 10 things that make me want to crawl in a hole:

1. People who throw cigarette butts out the car window.
2. Diet sodas. Let's face it, they taste like shit. If you're going there, just have a water for Christ's sake.
3. Tattle tales. It's true, they even exist as adults. These are people who are usually not super good at what they do and they sit back waiting for you to make a mistake and take note of it. Really? Oh yeah. Really. They're out there.
4. Fur coats or clothing. I'm a little confused about the resurgence of fur. I thought this whole bit of nonsense was in the past. Primarily, I think it's a terrible and immoral practice. Secondarily, it's just ugly. It belongs on an animal, where it's cute and fluffy.
5. That Pierce dude who's taking over Larry King's show. Larry King too. It's different things about them that I find annoying. Arrogance, mainly, but in different ways.
6. Send Out Cards. I will risk really offending someone with this, so I'm sorry in advance. But I like the look and feel of a card you've addressed and signed with your own two hands. I like writing them and I like receiving them. And this makes me like an old fashioned Gramma, I know.
7. Kids in beauty pageants. I'm serious. It's disgusting on so many levels.
8. Professional athletes who rape/ sexually assault women or who abuse animals and have consequences that are either non-existent or so minimal it's like "Oh that's baaad, we'll pretend we're really upset about it and send you to prison for half a year and then you'll get re-hired and make the gazillions back you had before you were busted."
9. The guy on TV who is the host of Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. He's the greasy looking man who eats his way across the United States at places that can give you a heart attack just by looking at them. He seems like a nice enough guy, but all of the man jewelry, the facial hair and the oil are just too much for me--especially with constant close ups of him eating..
10. Gummy stuff. Bears, worms, you name it. Don't you feel like you're eating a fishing lure? Hurl.

What's on your list?

Fear of Heights

I've never been too crazy about heights, and thanks to my father's forwarded e-mail, I was about to have a heart attack in the comfort of my own home as I contemplated THIS job:

Toxic Triple Berry

Understanding that I could turn you off from the beginning with this one, I'll start by saying I've never been a fan of cooked fruits in desert. So allow me to use them in a metaphor.

Dealing with individuals who preach about accountability but have no record of it themselves--or who simply don't have the skills to perform their tasks but revel in providing instruction to everyone else--can be a bit tiresome. When you add attitude to that equation, you have baked a perfectly overweight and toxic triple berry pie.

We all know these people. And we all know that choosing to laugh at the situations they inspire is a better option that getting your feathers all ruffled. Will someone remind me how?

I'm resorting to some tactics I taught myself eons ago which involve overly praising individuals for their brilliance. They feel reassured and eventually screw off, and inside, you know the truth.

The only problem is that it's insincere and I hate it.  But it works. I have the proof. Still, that little bug inside of me says, "Don't."

The other day I came across a simple quote I especially love: "Always treat people with politeness, even those who are rude to you--not because they are nice, but because you are."

Are you good at doing this? I am, outwardly. Inwardly, I am bothered by it if the person is someone with whom I must interact on a regular basis. It gets old and I wonder if the toleration serves either of us. 

On second thought, I guess politeness is different from toleration. You can still be polite while not allowing someone to continue with their mess. You just have to differentiate what part of it is bothering you (from the ego front) and what part cannot simply be allowed.

Your experiences with the Toxic Triple Berry?

Christmas This Year

It's been a good couple of days...pretty good.

Parents came in on Thursday for a short visit. Together time at the house, followed by an Indian dinner at Dawaat (divine!) and a stroll through lights at the botanical gardens were a perfect combo.

Friday's Christmas Eve was leisurely, except for one daring expedition into the insane rush of traffic. After braving the roads for a couple of last minute things--Merlot and a bottle of Bailey's to go with the next morning's Christmas coffee--I knew home was the right place for me. I had also waited in Starbucks for 20 minutes only to find they omitted the peppermint from my peppermint mocha. When you're dumb enough to pay $4 for a freaking cup of coffee, you feel like even more of an idiot when you find out you didn't get what you really wanted.

Back at home in a cheerfully devious spirit, I concocted a fabulous family Christmas letter (mocking all Christmas letters sent with misspelled words, incorrect grammar, famously boring details, inappropriate financial information, bragging about kids and accomplishments, etc.). The intended audience was family and close friends. I think they enjoyed it.

Christmas was lovely. Husband and I decided on bikes for each other so we could have another choice in our recreational outdoor pursuits. I'm happy with that. Although I feel that Husband would secretly enjoy more fishing paraphernalia, I think we'll enjoy our time together on trails and quiet streets.

Watching Flanders unwrap presents has always been a riot for us. She so much enjoys running around ripping paper off of squeaking balls and plush Santas, and when the paper has been shredded, she comes back for more. Only this year, her toys must have been pretty crappy. They were destroyed in under an hour.

It was lovely up until this evening when I saw a notice that my next Verizon bill is over $400. Wait...four what?  I was sure there was a reasonable explanation for all this, like Verizon majorly messed something up.

Except Verizon didn't mess up. My 14 year old has apparently been ordering adult films after school in the hour he is alone before we get home. I'm talking 18 of them in the past 25 days.

If you laugh, I'll kill you. It's not funny. I'm not only so upset I can't even express myself, but I'm scared. What kind of house is this? Don't tell me it's normal.  It's not normal for my house. What's worse?  The lying about it? The bill? The fact that my kid is watching pornography--a LOT of it?

We're currently trying to see what parts of his opulent Christmas can be returned to the store to raise the money he needs to pay that little bill.  I'm truly disappointed and am wondering who this kid is living here.

Looking at the larger picture, with so many people in the world and even in our own community not knowing where that next meal will come from, I know it's all small potatoes. I'm grateful for what we have and don't forget that for a minute. Still, having your trust betrayed is a real bitch, especially when you're worried about someone you love growing into a responsible and successful young man.

It's not the kind of ending I was hoping for this Christmas Day, but I give thanks for the abundance we do have in our lives. There's a lot to appreciate.

My Other Dog Face, Stream of Consciousness

So I marched down to the neighbor's house this evening and discovered that...

a.) It was not their sweet, old, shiter-spreading dog barking all night.
b.) They have taken in a second dog they found wandering around the street and have relentlessly tried to find its home for 4 days. That's not the dog barking either. They don't know what to do. The shelter here is full, and the pound carries an uncertain future.

The irresponsible person with the barking dog lives behind them. It barks all day. And it barks all night.

What is it with people and animals?!

The sound of the barking, obviously carrying farther in the cold air, resumed by 6:00 p.m. this evening. 
(Wait, does sound really travel farther in cold air? See answer.)

Neither my problem listening to the barking nor the dog's problem being left outside without care are resolved by this knowledge. And I feel pretty bad for the neighbors I labeled as the culprits at this point. They can't escape it, no matter what, because of their proximity.

So I have already established my love for all things animals with you, right? But let's just say I do not like to see pooches (however lovely they are) inside of stores or on airplanes. I looked up in Ann Taylor not long ago--stop me if I told you this already--and saw some lady with a snotty dog in a purse. "WTF," I thought, "this ain't no PetSmart."

Last week a plane bound for Phoenix landed in Pittsburgh because an 89 year old passenger's dog decided to let itself out of its little kennel. It bit another passenger and the flight attendant. Really? What the hell are dogs doing on planes again?  I forgot.

I feel sort of two-faced about the whole thing. My dog is a part of my family and I feel that pets should be treated as such. But there are certain places meant for humans--like places with tight spaces in which you've paid for a seat (and cannot escape) and places selling new goods or food you don't want to have touched by pet dander or hair.

Is that fair?  OMG! The dog stopped barking...

...Never mind, something was just loud on the tv.

I'd Like My Neighbors To Enjoy Being Outside Overnight in 32 Degrees

Maybe then they would have a greater understanding of how their dogs felt last night.

You screw with animals, and you're not really on my good side.

Around 4 am this morning, I heard a number of dogs barking on our street--dogs who had been left outdoors in the freezing temperatures we're experiencing here. In addition to being awake for quite a while after a very long work day yesterday, I can't sleep and am outraged at this irresponsibility.

Dogs are not objects. They deserve to be nurtured and taken care of. If you can't do it, don't own a dog. Don't "try it" and give the dog up if you can't handle it. Don't even make that decision to go there by getting one in the first place.

I called the police twice in the last two hours. When they arrived on the street, three of the barking dogs were just walking around the street.

I understand these things happen. Accidents occur. Dogs go under fences or escape through unsecured doors. But really? On a night when it's freezing here in Florida?

I know one household to which a barker from this long early morning belongs. The dog has been a wanderer for quite some time and is frequently found taking its morning constitutional in our backyard. I feel terrible for the dog--it's old and not well cared for. The problem is, the alternative is death in the pound. They don't go to great lengths to adopt old dogs out. They get euthanized.

I believe these neighbors have had difficult financial circumstances, but I'm so disappointed that they aren't doing what's best for their pet--or the neighborhood. And they're going to get a knock on the door from me when I get home this afternoon.

Perfect Gifts for Parents You Don't Like

If you really want to get back at someone you don't really like, there are a few things to add to your Christmas list for their toddlers.

What about Hungry Hippos? Guaranteed to make more noise than you would take in at a heavy metal concert.  The banging plastic parts on marbles is deadly, perfect for parents on your shiter list.

A close second is the good 'ole ant farm. I always wanted one of these, but everyone with any sense knows that a release is in the cards. At some point that baby is busting open and shedding tiny marching bodies everywhere. Before it happens, parents will go to bed knowing there are hundreds of ants in their home every night, wondering if tonight is the night when the great escape will occur.

Fish are good too--just one more thing for the parents to take care of.

Let's move onto just about any musical instrument for toddlers. It's not that music isn't fabulous for youngsters, but when they don't know what they're doing and are just at the pouncing and shaking stage, a nice junior keyboard can drive the parents mad. Along the same lines--karaoke machines for kids. Pretending you're loving that singing adds a terrific dimension to the torture.

A giant soaker water gun is one gift item I'm pretty sure was given to D-Man in his younger years by people who hated me. You see, when it's you, Husband and one little guy...and you have a giant soaker water gun in the equation...there are two people in the line of fire. One of them is yours truly. So yeah, I'd add the giant soaker to the top of your resident evil list.

After experiencing a number of these gifts first hand, I'll tell you that presents for boys and girls can also be nice treats for your senses if you have parental revenge on your mind. If you do like the parents, however, remember that anything you buy for that special kid will have a direct impact on the mental well being of his mom and dad. I'd go with socks, a nice stuffed animal, legos or erasable crayons if you want to preserve the integrity of your adult relationships.

"Maturing Like A Fine Wine or Scotch"

D-Man found himself in what my grandmother would have called "a world of trouble" when we learned things about his science project a few weeks ago--things like it was something he was supposed to do this quarter, not next.

While we were on the whole You're-Doing-This-Even-If-It's-Too-Late campaign, we experienced a few other frustrations along the way. After embarking on the required research about basil plants and soils, he managed to assemble some paragraphs from the required 5 sources.

I took one look at the paper and said, "You didn't just cut and paste this, did you? This is all in your own words?"

Maybe I was being unfair, but frankly, it was the phrase describing well-cultivated basil leaves as "maturing like a fine wine or scotch" that caught my eye.

Customer Service Advice to HP From a Soldier

On top of being one of the smartest, most interesting people I know, Ken Brennen sends me good finds for Gro--um, Mixed Reflections.  He found this video from a soldier in Iraq who was asked by HP to pay for one of their techies' advice on how to fix the crappy all-in-one printer he was using.

Since we've all been on the lousy end of the stick with customer service from big companies at one time or another (some more frequently than others), I thought I'd share this with you. It's pretty funny.



Oh how many times I've wanted to do just that with a printer, computer, cell phone, television or other piece of equipment falling short of its promise. Good luck with PR on this, HP!

Things I Don't Want to Run Into

1. People who were unkind and rude before they moved away and then come back to town and want to stop by and chat. I escaped this not long ago.
2. Anything I have attempted to cook--it's either burned, tough, rubbery, tasteless or disgusting in any number of other ways.
   
3. Born Agains who talk your ear off about how perfectly holy they are while having zero respect for anyone else on the planet with a different perspective.
4. A roach scurrying across any room in my house like they own the place. It's been a while, but unfortunately it's a fact of life in Florida. It's the only living thing I hate.
5. Alex Trebek. Thank goodness it's not too likely. (Picture me saying that in a French accent.)
6. Anyone who remembers my name when I can't remember theirs. I feel terrible.
7. The 3rd carpeted stair from the top when I'm carrying a cup of coffee. I tripped on it and nearly busted my ass at work a few days ago. Luckily the coffee didn't stain and I didn't die.
8. A clan of Father, Brother and Husband if they return from a fishing excursion with no fish.
9. Anyone who frequently uses the expression "You're a real rock star." It was cute at first, but come on, really?
   
10. Trees that look like this:

Anyone know what kid of tree that is? I photographed it at Marie Selby Botanical Gardens but can't remember what it is. Remembering not to bump up against it would be important.

Dear Metro PCS:

You've been pretty good to me. I mean where else can I get unlimited everything for 2 people for $110 a month with no contract? Although it's no secret that your phones are really crappy and don't really have the features I want, it's been a good trade off. Technically, I don't really need all those features.

I have to admit though, Metro PCS, that I was pretty annoyed about what happened this weekend when one of our mutual friends in India gave me a fax number instead of a phone number when I called directory assistance.

See, I asked for the charge to be removed and I was literally transferred to 5 different people until I was finally disconnected. This was after I spent 10 minutes talking to an auto-mamma trying to reach a real life Indian.

It's not that I totally love spending time shouting at your sweet sounding auto service.  But when I've said the word "CUSTOMER SERVICE" and "REPRESENTATIVE" and "AGENT" 39 times and keep hearing a female RoboCop say "I'm sorry, I'm having trouble understanding you," a plethora of four letter words start coming out of the woodwork. 

It's not very professional of me, I know, but it's just so frustrating to have you purposely make it difficult to contact a living human being. But again, Metro, I'm getting it now. That's what's up with the cheap rates.

So the Number Three person you transferred me to (after all the auto drama) told me that in order for you to help me, I needed to recite some pass code I created 2 years ago when I first signed up for Metro PCS. Sorry, I didn't remember that. Later, after yet another person helped me cut through 98 layers of security to get the pass code, I was transferred again. 

Number Four argued with me about the charge insisting that it was "only fifty cents."   Wait...did I really hear that?  It must have been a joke.  After all, after investing half of my afternoon meeting all of your associates--both real and computer generated--it's clearly the principle of the whole thing. By the time I was finished, I would have gladly paid YOU fifty cents an hour for the time remaining before I get an iPhone if you would just stop passing me around.

I'm ashamed to admit, Metro, that you won. Basically, you totally wore me out. After speaking briefly with Number Five, holding for what seemed like an eternity and then realizing no one was on the other end of the call, I gave up. 

Thanks for clarifying why the service is so cheap. I appreciate knowing the back story. Now, what would I give to have a recording of my dialogue with your auto service.

A Strange and Unpleasant Morning at School

I awoke in the middle of the night really, really pissed. After trying to get in touch with D-Man's science teacher through phone and e-mail for well over a week about a very pressing problem, on Tuesday morning I resorted to calling the vice principal. He assured me he would take care of it, yet alas, as of Wednesday evening, I had heard nothing.

So during what has now become now my standard 1:00 a.m. wake up call with Flanders, I started stewing to the point that I just couldn't get back to sleep.

I showed up at the school this morning at 8:15 a.m. and vowed to wait in the office until VP arrived. And wait I did.

After over an hour (oh yes, it's been a fine week for Gropius), Husband and I were becoming increasingly agitated.  A semi-comic relief entered the office area, and it was just so bizarre at the time...but now, of course I'm feeling the terror of what she actually described. Terror for the animal that is.
 
So picture it. We're sitting there, arms crossed in frustration, watching the scene...

• Lingering students who, for whatever reason, weren't in class
• Non-English speaking parents struggling to converse with the receptionist about a bus stop at a seemingly non-existent address
• A grandmother storming in with her grandson who had been bullied on the bus
• A half dressed mother enrolling her student in school

"Middle school in 2010," I thought. "Jesus, is this a school...for real?"

Now that you have the scene in your mind, enter stage right a very overweight woman wearing a sundress and lots of bling on the fingers. She's carrying a dog that is dressed in a baby's onesie. Um okay, now we have dogs in the school? (And keep in mind, I am a dog lover, but really, at school?)  She sits down beside Larry and allows the dog to start running around the office. No one seems to care.

And then it gets weirder. She begins to tell us--along with everyone else within a 300 ft. radius who isn't consumed with the other disturbing issues going on--about how she really "don't know nothing about no dogs." ...How her former dog was "just like this one," but "I stepped on it in the middle of the night and caused trauma to its head" and "after I paid $2,000 in vet bills they had to put it to sleep anyway."

"So I just up and got a new one. $2,000 this one cost me too. Mmmm hmmm," she continued.

She got up and left, came back in with the dog 5 or 10 minutes later and left again. I have no freaking idea what she was even doing in the office. It was like a scene from Candid Camera, except no one came in to surprise us with the big joke.

I wish this had an interesting ending, but that's all she wrote for my storytelling skills tonight. I'm absolutely exhausted. And wondering if I'm still in the after 1 a.m. realm...maybe this day never happened.

Yes--I wish. But today was only a day, and there are much worse things going for others. Perspective: I try.

Oh Baby, You are Sooo Dramatic! ...Including Online

The Drama Queens in life can keep you talking or keep you laughing...but in the end, frankly, I just find they keep you exhausted. It takes a lot of energy to listen, respond and figure out how to avoid the total infiltration of their movie scripts into your being. They've been loud soldiers in the physical world, and now they've permeated the digital one.

Some people are experts at stirring up controversy, implying ill-intentions with every move from "the enemy," and basically verbalizing every dividing thought to enter their minds--thoughts which can do little to improve the silence. (In making that statement I realize how much I could tone the heck down and listen to my own dialogue--inward and outward--to make sure that my own comments actually improve the silence!  Point taken.)

I enjoyed a panel discussion on Ethics in the Media on Monday, and I found that one of the exceptional issues raised was about the proliferation of commentary that is cleverly posed as fact. Unfortunately, this sort of "news" mixed with opinion from self-made journalists has been propagated famously by semi-news media (fairly, on the far right and left) and by our buddies, bloggers from all corners.

With most bloggers, the opinionated nature of their posts is obvious, and I love them. I love reading and responding to the diversity of opinions. The line is crossed when the "news" bloggers aren't providing truth. That's why I don't read news blogs. (Okay, for the most part I don't. I'll confess, I love a good liberal news blog.)

I am a fan of this age of self-publishing. It sounds silly to frame it this way, but it puts the power back in the hands of the people. Information isn't something you can control anymore, clearly. In less than one sentence and one click, your thought is out there for the masses. It's not just up to the old man on the evening news.

The danger comes in the Drama Queens that disguise themselves as Hard Reporters. When dialogue disguised as truth is nothing more than your very passionate feelings, sheesh, that's scary. It's fine when you know it's opinion; otherwise, we're consumers of crap. That much was well covered during the panel discussion. Glad it was put out there for the audience to digest with lunch. For the most part, we all have the same concern: what can you trust? Who can you trust?

What are your thoughts on the Drama Queens of the world? And fact vs. opinion?

A Pretty Telling E-Mail

Sometimes e-mail is a terrible way to communicate. You can't be too sure of someone's tone, and interpretation is wide open.

Other times, it's a sure fire way to really understand who you're dealing with. Take this e-mail, a response from Buena Vista Inn owners after receiving a note from sister-in-law about the really bad experience with them over the weekend.

Need I say more?

Aside from this interesting stab at business grammar, it's pretty fascinating to see that she insists that my in-laws never stayed there.  This e-mail will be a gem when they dispute the credit card charges.  If they didn't stay, what's that charge to Buena Vista Inn doing on their cards? Hmmm...I'd love to see the answer to that one.

I'd rather not get involved in these sorts of things, but when people--especially paying customers--are treated so badly, it's unjust not to let others know about it. Talk about unethical business practices!

Let's see: deny a complaint by saying there was no stay at the Inn AND charge their credit cards for the stay?  Not sure you can have it both ways.

Buena Vista Inn A Day Keeps the New Smyrna Tourists Away

New Smyrna Beach is a great little town on the east coast of Florida with beautiful beaches and parks, boutique stores and restaurants and a charming downtown area.

But if the town is interested in dismissing visitors with money in their pockets, Tactic 1 would be to send 'em to Buena Vista Inn. I can't recall meeting anyone in the service industry as rude, crude and socially unacceptable as Owner.

My in-laws booked two rooms there during our weekend celebrating Niece's first birthday. After they spent one night, the moldy smell was a little too much. While cancellation policies are understandable to prevent lost income, it would have been the Kosher thing to let them out of the second night, given the reason. 

If it's just not possible to do that, fine. I repeat, that's fine. But the attitude and carrying on copped by the owner were almost comical. Almost.

She smugly lectured us about how many people were pounding down the doors to book a room for the weekend, and how she had to turn them down because all rooms were taken. "You're asking me to take money out of my own pocket so you can put money in your pocket. Do you know what this does to me?"  she went on.

Taking it a step further, as Owner was charging each credit card for the full amount, allowing one person to sign for all, she three times mentioned how much we had "changed her day."

"Well, this just never happens. In the last 11 years I've only had 3 people request a cancellation of their reservation. This has just changed my entire day."

Oh, I'm so sure.

Finally, after hearing it for the third time, I said, "In what way has this changed your day? You're still charging them the same as you would have if they didn't make this request...You're not losing a dime."

Owner: "Well, it must be so nice not to have any stress in your life."
Gropius: "Oh I have plenty of stress in my life. I just choose to deal with it in a different way."
Owner: "Well aren't you special?"

At this point, things went downhill. Names were exchanged. Owner said that she would only share where one member of our party could obtain a nebulizer for her son if "the other girls are controlled and are made not to say things about me all over town since I'm held in such high esteem."

Right.  It would seem that this situation has repeated itself many times. With that, I was pretty sure that blogging would be a well-deserved reward for the behavior.

After getting to my parents' house, we called the inn innocently to ask if rooms were available.  Oh yes, there were three. I checked out Trip Advisor, and we weren't the first to call out Owners for rudeness.

Bottom line: It's her right to be excessively rude and dishonest to customers. And it's my right to share the experience. You never know what's going on in someone's life. I don't know what her life is like behind the attitude. Nor does she know what her customers might have on their shoulders. It's hard to guess about anyone, so being a nice human being usually works out just fine.

How did we get so polarized?

Lately there's been a lot of angst in the air about an Amendment that Floridians will be voting on in November. Politics in general have been angrier than ever.  The divisiveness is palpable every moment. I've caught myself feeling my own anger-- not against those who take the opposite side, but against those who spread misleading information and use it to polarize relationships. Okay, honestly, sometimes it is against those who take the opposite side, just because I feel so passionate about my side.

I do remind myself that what's great about America is that we can have political differences, exchange conversation representing different viewpoints, and in the end, we can still co-exist without retribution for our convictions. We can dwell more on what we have in common while using dialogue about various perspectives to make our society better. 

But do we really? Or do we call the opposition "ignorant" and distant ourselves from them socially and otherwise?

I'll admit having done this. And I couldn't say I would never do it again. But it's usually when that person is not just vocal about his/her politics, but obnoxious and offensive. 

I'm not sure anyone taught us how to disagree respectfully, and that it's okay not to feel the same about everything as your neighbor. What's important is to be a neighbor.

Maybe so many of us turn angry when our sacred beliefs are challenged in the political process and we feel helpless to change them. I think the anger comes from a feeling of injustice, or more simply, not being heard. 

Either way, we don't all agree. We never will. And until we can be civil to each other, nothing, absolutely nothing will change.

Sometimes I Can't Believe I Make It To Work

It's not so much about the alarm clock, or the fact that I've been up 500,000 times to supervise Flanders' urination needs...or her Cone of Shame...

It's that people drive like such asses.

I can't believe I made it to work today.

Several people pulled out in front of me going like 10 miles per hour, ignoring the fact that I was well on my way at nearly 50. Someone else darted across two lanes in front of me so they could make an immediate right hand turn. And some other crazy man took about 32 minutes to pull off the road, almost coming to a complete stop, when he decided to grace a rental center with his presence.

When people in the far left lane slow to the point of nearly going backwards long before merging into a turn lane--now there's another classic. Gotta experience that one at least once per day.

From the landside, I've just about had enough of landscaping people using their blowers to move sand, trash and other crap out of parking lots and sidewalks, only to blow it directly on my car. I'm really over that.

Okay here it is: I'm grateful to have a car. I'm truly thankful I don't have to endure a two hour ride to work on our pitiful public transportation system. And I'm really appreciative that I get there safely every day. 

I just wish people would stop driving like complete dorks. I feel like I put my finger in an electric socket before I even get to work.

Twitter, The Majestic Plastic Bag & Birds and Bunnies Environmentalism

One of my favorite aspects of Twitter is its use as a quick source of news, updates and information about the issues that are important to me. If you follow organizations and news sources that understand how to use Twitter, you get a constant stream of links to breaking stories, articles and media that are useful and thought-provoking. I use it a lot at work to stay on top of nonprofit trends and resources.

Anyway, Audubon of California just tweeted a link to this video called "The Majestic Plastic Bag: A Mockumentary." It follows the personified life of a plastic bag and it's migration. We follow it floating about in the breeze through parking lots and parks, down sewage drains, down a river and into the ocean. You can see the path of destruction as it makes its way to the Pacific Garbage Patch, this massive collection of crap--plastic, sludge, waste, etc.-- that's come together through ocean currents off the west coast of the US.

When I first heard about this a few years ago, I thought it was another Snopes story. But apparently, it's the size of Texas (perhaps even larger) and is estimated to contain millions of tons of trash.

We have plenty of reusable grocery bags, and most of the time these days, I actually remember to bring them with me to the store. But even those bags have a limited life and are made of materials that require processing and consume resources. The bottom line is that I need to consume less altogether.

I had this great environmental politics professor when I was at the University of Florida. He referred to "Birds and Bunnies Environmentalism" when he talked about this very American view that we can still consume the same amount of stuff and it will all be okay because of new scientific advances, technology and recycling. We all tend to forget (myself included) the "reduce" and the "reuse" parts.  It involves a culture change. And that takes time. I just wonder how much time we really have before we've screwed things up so much they can't be repaired.

Interesting...this cycle of consumption beyond our means and beyond what earth can support is also causing the breakdown of our economy.

If you have 3 minutes, the "Mockumentary" is a cleverly written and filmed video (very funny too)....although for some reason, it's stretching waaay across my blog. 

Mars Will Appear as Large as the Moon...and Pigs Will Fly

I'm always amazed at the wealth of BS that circulates across the channels of e-mails. Aside from desperate appeals from Nigeria, it's increasingly difficult to decipher what's real and what isn't. Too bad Dali isn't still around--he would love the digital age and would be a texting maniac.

We were talking today at a breakfast about the celestial gift of the month, that Mars will make a once-in-our-lifetime appearance close to earth.  I heard about this a few weeks ago and thought, man, that's so cool!  There was absolutely no reason not to believe it.

And then something triggered in my memory--didn't this already happen a few years ago?  I seem to remember hearing about this event of the century very recently.  Am I already 134 years old?

Then I started hearing variations of the story--that Mars would be so close it would actually look like we had two moons!  What? Absolutely amazing. [Were there two moons in Planet of the Apes?  I could be completely wrong about it, but sounds like it would be a good fit.]

Get ready with your fishin' pole, Hubbie! The tides will be high and the catchin' good.

I'm a big fan of Snopes.com. I love being able to shoot on over there and find out if something is a total crock of doodoo, a partial deception, or actually (and more rarely) true. Here's what Snopes.com has to say about this hoax:

"Some things never go out of style, and the 'Mars Spectacular' is one of them."  

To paraphrase the whole thing, Mars did come very close to Earth in 2003, but it happens every 15-17 years. And during that time, Mars did appear as large as the moon--if you were using a telescope with a 75 power magnification.   Nice one.

So when in doubt, check it out.  I always learn something interesting and then take a moment to peak at the top 25 urban legends to arm myself for the next forwarded e-mail.

P.S. In Planet of the Apes, there is no moon. I looked it up. But I didn't find that one on Snopes. Or on NASA's website. Man, they've got to get it togethaaa.